Once again I shall attempt to entertain you while I prattle on about whatever is in my head at this moment. Most people blog about very specific things that seem interesting. I on the other hand choose to go on about whatever topic amuses me at this very moment as I poorly type this out. All the while doing what I can to butcher the English language, destroy all hopes of proper grammar and throw in whatever spelling errors seem funny. Heh…. teh… I love that one.
It may surprise most of you but I do in fact enjoy reading. A lot! A sci-fi something here, and fantasy there, a few classics for good measure topped off with some useless comic books about super powered people in very tight costumes. I like me some Harry Potter, some Dan Brown, give me some Stephan King and maybe an Amanda Hocking from time to time just because she’s from Minnesota. But over time my love of written word had slowed down as my extreme love for all things video game took hold as I have spent the last year looking for a new job.
Recently that has changed though! Not the job, I still have none… stupid work force not seeing my obvious brilliance! Recently with much thanks to my wonderful woman also know as “the wife” I am now the proud owner of the Amazon Kindle. I say proud like its my first born playing her cello on stage, or like its my youngest putting on some goofy performance in front of a bunch of strangers not realizing they are there watching her. No its more like proud to have some new-fangled gadget to help increase my status as a geek in today’s pop culture. Let’s face it the only cool we recognize these days are the geeks and nerds that have all the cool stuff, money, and somehow score the super models even though they still live in mom’s basement.
The Kindle. A simple thing really. It can hardly be considered fancy tech when you have those iPod thingys and iPad doo-hickys and iEveryThingElseMadeByAppleThatWeAllGoCrazyOver. In its own right though, it is remarkable for it is simple… easy… almost sexy for it knows what it is. It knows you want it even when you say you don’t. And it can hold over 3,000 of your favorite and soon to be favorite books. I love it for I don’t have to keeping making trips to sell off books before they over run my house. Nor will I have to re-buy the books a year latter when I realized, “Wait! I want to read that again, why the hell did I sell it?!” I can buy all the books I want thanks to this doo-dad and store them all in the nice confines of my new digital library.
Things you can do with your Kindle: You can travel to new worlds, explore history, chase down the bad guys or even smack around a few good ones. You can go on an epic quest, cheer on some over dramatic kid flying around on a broom or even puke in your mouth a little bit as you tell yourself, “Yeah… that stupid cat may cave in and eat green eggs and ham, but I’m sure as hell not going to give myself food poisoning just because some whatever the heck that guy is tells me to do so with clever rhymes.”
What you can’t do with your Kindle: You can’t put it in your pocket and sit down. It doesn’t work out well. Your leg sort of shoots out straight like the whole thing is made out of wood or something… you end up doing some strange sort of flopping to one side maneuver throwing one hip down and one hip up trying to recover some bit of dignity while attempting to NOT break the kindle… it just doesn’t end well for you. It ends great for them damn laughing teenagers already downloading the video on to YouTube, but not for you. Nope… stupid kids…
A lot of people tell me, “I would never get one of those Kindle thing-a-ma-whats-its for I need to feel the paper from the rainforest that died to make my slutty romance novel in my hands! I need the smell of the pages, the dust that makes me sneeze and look of the finger print stains on the pages while I eat some cheetoes as I read. Nope! I will never own a Kindle!” Okay they might not say all of that, I just assume that’s what they mean since its what I use to do. But you get the idea. For those people I say read on. To those who thing eReaders like the Kindle will put an end to paper books, I say no worries… the Internet might have already done that.
Books will always have their place, though years from now I see kids sitting down at a table somewhere staring at some gadget watching TV or playing games, or blogging and what not when suddenly one of them puts the gizmo down and opens up their bag. They open it and pull out something that seems all so new and strange. It will make the others turn their heads to look eagerly at it with such jealous wonderment that you will hear angels singing from the sky, birds chirping happy tunes and people like Steve Jobs and Bill Gates rolling over in there century old graves. A light will shine down on this young person as they pull out this odd thing made of paper. Strange symbols printed on it which form words and bound together in leather and glue. He sets this wonderful new crazy thing down on the table and his envious friends will turn to him and ask, “What is it?” he will smile and say, “It’s a book.” They will “ooo” and “ahhh” Someone will lean in for a closer look and ask. “What do you do with it?” This person will look his friends in the eyes to make sure they are all paying attention, he will open it wide and explain with vigor and wonder, “You boldly go where no one has gone before… you read it.” And as his friends stand to cheer this new and great creation, he will begin to read it out loud so that all can embrace the sheer joy that is a BOOK! And he reads, “I will not eat them here, or there, I will not eat them anywhere! I don’t not like green eggs and ham, I do not Sam I am!!”
“Whoa… that’s deep man” some kid will say next to him.
“Stupid kids…” some old guy on a bench behind them will mumble to himself.
You didn’t ask what was on my mind, but I told you anyway.